The moment I think I know him he amazes me . I thought for a mere second that I had my head around God. That I finally "got it". And there he went, showing me how much bigger than my brain he is.

I wanted to give the Holy Spirit room to move and work. There had been a worship session done a few months ago at church in the evening where it included music and prayer and the Spirit having the freedom to move. Just a sense of no agenda.

So I thought..Again! we need that again! no structure! no agenda!. And then my husband bats that out of the field with...."well if your doing the same thing twice hoping to get a random worship session of unplanned, no agenda. You are making it planned by planning it. You are scheduling it hoping for the same action of randomness. "

And I was....

I wanted the very same great experience of the Holy Spirit working on me as it had then. And it wasn't possible. Because I loved how we weren't told to sit and to stand. To be praising or in prayer. It was just arriving that made it great. Arriving with no agenda. But to do it twice suddenly starts an agenda...
I wanted God to come close like he had then. But I'm not who I was then, even if it was a few months ago.

We have so many "traditions" these days. Church every Sunday. In a building. With music, then prayer, then preaching then prayer then music then coffee.
But how many "traditions" does God have in the bible. Some festivals in the year. And communion.
When did we box God up? Stifle him into a building and brick him in? When did we put a sheet of agenda in front of him and say..meet us on Sunday at this time and this place.
I want to unbox him and throw away that sheet and say "God, tell me where to meet you! What do you have in store ? What will we do with you today?"