My Cuddlemonkey's

Ride an Elephant

At the age of about 9 I walked into my first circus. There were colors and sounds and excitement all over and kids running along side smiling parents.
I was travelling with my friend and her mom. They had invited me along with them which I normally wouldn't have gone with my parents.
When we entered the trasformed local arena that then appeared as that of a circus ring show area I grew with excitment and talked away with my friend about all we were seeing. It was the preview time before hand and you could visit the clowns or ride the elephant.
Over the speaker my name was called and I almost wasn't sure it was me. I had won a door prize. A sparkly baton that I held high and swirled around. A prize I could not have bought.
Before the show started my friend and her mom went on the elephant. I remember wanting so much to go on too but it was $5. I had got in with a free ticket from school and won a baton but all these things were given to me and I could not have got them on my own. I was a poor kid. We just didn't have money and my mom wasn't about to give us money to go to the circus with.
I think inside I always wanted to go on that elephant ride. Like some long lost kid dream that you stick away somewhere.

I'm 31 now. And I paid $5 at African Lions Safari so that me and my oldest boy could enjoy an elephant ride. There was something so important on the inside of me to take that ride. To pay that $5 dollars and ride that tiny track and get my photo taken.
Somewhere on the inside I remembered what it was like to not have that $5 and I've never appreciated such a child's ride so much that I could ever remember.

Big Ben

 He's big, beautiful Benjamin. He wakes in the morning with squeals of delight. I wander in in half a daze to find a boy who loves to wake up in the morning. Obviously taking after his dad.

I must admit that I take some special delight to see other babies of the same age. In comparison I haven't seen one that measures to the length or structure of my big Ben. Inside I

 smile with joy to think I may have a big son when he grows up.
Something about the idea of having two boys taller than my husband and I both is such a point of pride for me as a mom.

Aside from his size I love his eyes. They seem so soft and curious of the world around him. No fears or worries. Just a tenderness that only seems to

 last a short while when we are young.

With a large open mouth smile he greets onlookers and stares in a way that would be rude if he were an adult. But since he's a baby people take it as a compliment that he finds them interesting. They'll smile back and wonder what is so special about them that a baby would care to look so long.

And at night, I tuck him in giving him a bottle in bed. As I hold it I give a big yawn and he stares and then smiles as if I have told a hilarious joke. I don't know what is so funny about me yawning but he certainly must think my gap is huge, because he pauses every time to smile. And I think to myself..baby, why do you stare at me? what is so interesting?

Two kids packed, two grown ups good to go. We headed out on the road for our two hour drive to a family shin dig.
I love and hate road trips. They consist of massive packing and the hope that our children will sleep on the way. Mostly they are good and just watch out the windows. We've got better at knowing to be on the ball with road trip food,snacks,drinks and meal times. This makes it all easier.
We arrive and I am no longer a primary care giver. My youngest is wisked away and my oldest plays in the dirt till he looks like "pig pen" from Charlie Brown.

The day's filled with food, laughter, model plane show and water ballons. And my oldest who hates the local water park get willingly hosed down by his cousin.

With baths and ice cream and finally some lolli pops we all pack back into the vehicle with the hope that they'll be asleep in a short time. Smiles and hugs all around.
And quiet....most of the way home. :)

Knighthood

In our home we knight our boys young :)

Boy of Adventure.

 He runs and plays on his own still. Ever adventurous and shy. He loves to explore the deep shadows of the forest or just the bushes at the local park.
Running like a page in training to one day be a knight he looks at the world much like me, an adventure. A lost world full of evil to fight and, in his case, maidens to be rescued. This being the stage before girls become gross.
When he sees other kids playing he sneaks along side, especially older kids. Fascinated by these middle sized people. Mimicing their actions and curious to be around them, he watches intently.

 I delight in his exploration of the world. He makes me smile with every new handful of dirt or picking of leaves. Each new find that I then have to say...no baby, that's yucky, and take the trash he's found away.

 His favourite part though..the swings. I can't seem to get him back to the slide. He just likes to swing, ... and swing....and swing. :)

Another good day.