My wife is pregnant and yelling...what do I do?

One moment your coming home, quiet and cozy to your simple home on the prarie with an ipod or whatever. Modernize that prarie home if you will. 

You take off your coat and set your feet up and WHAM! a pot gets set down in a most ugly fashion. Next thing you know a snarling wolverine woman appears infront of you, posing as your prenant wife. But could it be? NO. She was glowing earlier today. This isn't your wife. It must have ate your wife! and now its yelling at you. 

Its like a game of hot at cold. The more comfortable you seem in that chair the more she yells. drop the feet to the floor and stand up and wolverine woman backs down and festers to the kitchen again to bang some pots.

What was that yelling you think? What did I do wrong? 

 First off. Realize  that even if it isn't your fault, its just easier to take the blame for a while. It will pass whatever it is and you can prove your "rightness" at some other time.

Next, do not proceed to try to negotiate or fix the problem. Obviously it is too late and any denial will only make any arguement continue on longer than you want.

Please, get out of your chair, go after your wife, sit down and say nothing at this point. Just sit. Your presence in the room is enough. A woman in essence is able to complete an argument almost fully all on her own.

There will be some key points that you may have to grit through just because she pregnant and probably out of her mind because of the hormones. Otherwise this would be a fair fight. 

She'll bring up the problem, then the problem of last week. She may then continue onto that problem that you thought was settled from the last fight but obviously she's and her fierce hormones have been festering on it all this time. 

Next you'll be brought to the part of the wreckage that may include anything from failures in your marriage to how you love your mom more than her and how having a baby is all going to be on her shoulders.

Trust me when I say...just let this phase in the arguement pass. You don't have to agree with her. You just have to keep looking her way and don't loose eye contact. If it helps you may want to jump on the table at some point and act larger than her by stretching out your shirt. I've heard that is how to deal with a mountain lion. Whatever you do, don't run. They only run after you. And although pregnant they are very quick.

In the end she'll give up in a frenzy and cry and then is your chance to quickly step in and offer a hug. Remember that if a hug is not taken or pushed away you'll need to wait another moment until the cookie has fully crumbled. Then move in for the save. And Voila. You've survived the attack of the hormones. 

Put your feet up. You've worked hard.

Virgin at 30?

Are you offended by my gray hair? Does it make you giggle to see a 30 year old with gray hair? I have a bunch. And I've had them since I was 20. I've just been dying them all this time.

You never knew did you? You just though my hair was naturally a beautiful medium brown with high lights of red here and there. That occasionally it would change with the season and get stunning sun lite high lights. Sure. I'm sure you believed that.

So you didn't. The same as I don't believe that your hair is fully ....whatever color it is. Virgin hair is a term used to describe hair that hasn't been dyed ever or is fully grown out. And as rare a thing as a virgin is over 20 these days, so rare is it to find a woman with such hair.

Nevertheless. I'm letting mine grow out and I have gray hair. And you'll notice it. Yes, there is plenty of it. And I'm okay with that.

Why can't I age? Why can't I have gray hair? Why do I have to stay striving for the beauty of youth for the rest of my years? I won't do it! Nope. I'm giving up on that race.
Lets face it. Are old people ugly? Do they reek of a slobb-ish look. No not at all. In fact a well dressed senior or even 40 year old can reek of sophistication if taken care of and being courageous to be who they are.

A cool guy once wrote:
Gray hair is a crown of splendor; it is attained by a righteous life.
Proverbs 16:30-32

I'm going to be who I am. Maybe next year I'll dye my hair but right now I need to be okay with me. Okay to have gray hair and glasses. Okay to see a wrinkle and not freak out. Okay that when I go to doctors appointments they now refer to time as "while as we get older".
I want to age with class and not some gripping handle hold on a photo in my brain when I was 17 and 120 lbs. (man, that was an awesome time...if only I knew now...blah blah blah)
And just a note of thank you to a good friend named Lisa, who has for years been sporting her beautiful gray hairs with pride. Who I thought was so courageous when we were 25 for doing so.
Beauty is only skin deep. After that I hope I can boast of having guts!

Network Ettiquett

Ever knock someone off your social network and wonder if they even noticed? Oh, you live far enough away that you won't bump into them any time soon. And surely at some point they may notice that your gone. Yup, gone for good. Out the internet door with your coat and your hat and a stiff "I've had enough".
Like dumping someone you shyly click that "take off friends list" and secretly inside wonder how long it will take for them to notice.
Relief sets in. They're gone. No more of those sarcastic sayings on your pages or rude comments. No more of their bad jokes or annoying groups that they've joined. Your free! Free from all of that!

But will they notice? What if they never notice? What if it never even crosses their little mind that your gone? What kind of a dumping is that? Its like you left with the the big door slam and the last word and they just stayed on the couch and ordered pizza with no blink of an eye. They didn't even notice your toothpaste was gone from the bathroom sink and you took your most favorite snugly blanket too. Man, the nerve of those people! Not even to think that perhaps your little comments of what was going on in your life each day could have even been of any importance to them. Their so self involved. Really!

....

The reality sets in that you can't go back. You can't go and hit "friend request" to them. You can't turn around. They'll then KNOW that you deleted them from your exclusive list of friends and no dead beat excuse of "oh I must have hit that button by accident" will ever save you. Nope. Your out of their gossip ring. You'll never know who their dating now unless through some other friend. The drama of their day to day life that you used to secretly love creeping is a long lost memory to you.

In light of it all your a better person in the end. Sure why not. Out with the old and keeping on with those true friends you have. The ones that really matter. Loyal and loving. Well just the other day I had Kendra on my mind as such a good friend. We haven't spoke in a bit but I did email her that really funny joke. Well I wonder what she's up to.....that's odd. Where's her name on my list?